Stoicism can teach us how to reduce the unpleasant feelings and emotions we encounter on a daily basis and how to strengthen our emotional fortitude. Stoics advise us to set internal rather than external goals when it comes to setting goals, whether they are weekly targets, daily goals, or New Year’s resolutions. What are internal and external goals, then? Let’s start by examining how Stoicism views control and no control.

First, we have events over which we have absolutely no control. An easy example of this is the weather. We can not control any aspect of the weather. It might be too hot for our taste, but the best we can do is get someplace with air conditioning. We sure can’t reduce the outside temperature, can we?

Next, there are events that are under our partial control. This might be if you win at a boxing match or gain acceptance into a particular college, as examples. We can only control part of this event, our part, but there are outside influences that are at play that can influence the outcome as well. Finally, there are events over which we have complete control. Things like the goals we set for ourselves and your thoughts and actions.

Many people make the mistake of setting goals for things over which they have little or no control. When an unfavorable outcome occurs, we feel let down, disappointed, unhappy, and frequently, like a failure. Stoicism teaches us to focus our objectives and goal-setting on things and events over which we have control.

Let’s say you’re a writer. A common goal of many writers is to become a best-selling author. They focus their work on writing a book that will be popular with many people and make them a lot of money. Most often, the book receives meager sales, if the book is even successful in getting published. Given all the effort, they feel like failures because all their work was for nothing.

A stoic writer would approach this much differently. They would focus on writing the best book that they could. Focus on the expression of their inner vision and not on becoming published. Some authors consider their effort as successful if it is enjoyed or helps just one person. There should be no concern about it becoming a best seller. The goal should the things within their ability to control. Big, giant, massive difference! Writing the best book possible, which is something they can control, should be their focus. This requires a paradigm shift in how we approach and set our goals. It only requires you to view things a little differently, but it will increase your ability to enjoy life and all its adventures.

People in creative fields like writers frequently have their work rejected. Many aspiring writers are ejected, leaving them devastated and never submitting any work again. How can you then improve your chances of success by minimizing the psychological harm of rejection? Objectives must be internalized. Internal goals, such as how many times you submit the manuscript in a specific time frame or how hard you work on a book, are preferable to external ones like getting your novel published. Of course, this won’t completely undo the psychological harm caused by rejection, but it sure can minimize it. You can shorten the period of grieving to a week or a day rather than a year before resubmitting your work. By doing this, there is a far better chance of gaining publication.

Let’s approach this thought process through the example of sports. Let’s say you’re a boxer. You train hard, day after day, pay your dues, and then finally get a big match. Your goal is to win the match and dominate your opponent, but at the end of the first round, you realize you’ve underestimated him. Your opponent has peppered you with several jabs to the face and hammered your torso repeatedly. You are completely off your game, and the mindset of dominating this guy is out the window. And your chances of winning the match aren’t looking too good. Your mindset and thoughts have laid the foundation for your disappointment and likely defeat.

Now, imagine the same boxer, but this time focused on fighting the absolute best match that he can against the same opponent. This won’t change the chances of winning, but setting the goal of fighting a best fight will lower the likelihood that the outcome is disappointing even if defeated. Setting internal (controllable) goals is preferable to setting external (uncontrollable) goals. Why? Because internal goals reduce the potential for future disappointment and emotional suffering.

Do you see how this stoic mind shift can be beneficial in other areas of your life? We, as humans, seem to have a tendency to make ourselves unhappy and disappointed. Break that self-destructive cycle and adopt the Stoic method of goal setting. You’ll thank me later.